November 22, 2011 by Michael Alexander
If you’ve moved before, you know that it can be an extremely challenging task; and that’s especially true for the parents of small children. You don’t have to be a parent for long to figure out that even slight changes to their normal routines can affect them significantly. Long distance moves almost always bring a whole variety of changes that can be difficult for children to deal with—they’re leaving behind familiar faces and spaces—so it’s important to help them through the transition. Here are a few tips designed to help prepare your child for the move:
Maintain open communication
Talking to your children about their fears, concerns and excitement is vital to helping them through the move. It’s important that they feel free to express their feelings about the changes taking place. Let them know that their thoughts are valuable, important and welcome. While moves can be caused by any number of circumstances, both good and bad, being open and honest about why you’re moving and what to expect will remove some of the anxiety. The fewer “unknowns” your child has to contemplate, the better.
Embrace the positives and address the negatives
Moving to a new city with entirely new surroundings can bring exciting opportunities that your child may actually look forward to. Consider letting them help decorate and design their own room (e.g. choose paint colors, and bedding); or talk about the new places they’ll be able to visit, like zoos, parks, museums and amusement parks. These things can be huge bright spots in a time of stressful transition. Of course, things like moving to a new, unfamiliar school, getting accustomed to a new teacher and leaving familiar surroundings behind may be viewed in a negative light. Addressing the negatives frankly and openly and talking through them can be reassuring to your child.
Say So Long, not Goodbye
One of the hardest things about moving, for adults and children alike, is leaving behind family and friends. Help your child make a list of important people they want to say goodbye to before leaving, then create an address book to keep up with contact information for those people. Before you leave, make a point to visit the people on the list (maybe even with a going away party), and make sure your child understands that they will have the opportunity to stay in contact with those people. Thanks to services like Skype, staying in contact is much, much easier these days!
Find resources that address moving on their level
Whether you visit local library or take a trip to the bookstore in your area, you’ll find there are several children’s books available that do a great job of addressing moving and the emotions associated with it. This post, titled The Best Kids Books about Moving, is a great resource for finding books that are good for your child’s age range. If you choose to check books out of your library, just remember to return them before your moving truck hits the road!
It’s also a great idea to request a “newcomers guide” from your new city’s chamber of commerce or visitor’s center. These will normally display photos of the area and fun things to do; getting familiar with the area, if only thorough pictures, can help them feel like they know what to expect.
The fact that you’re taking time to research ways to help make moving easier for your children is a sign of good parenting. Way to go! It’s good to remember that children are often more resilient than we give them credit for. Though moving is no doubt a difficult transition for everyone, most parents find that keeping the lines of communication open, and finding fun ways to get them involved in their new community makes it much more manageable.
Author Byline
Michael Alexander is a long-time Corporate Relocation Specialist for MoveBuilder and U-Pack Moving. His focus is on helping relocating transferees make a seamless transition to their new homes via either the full-service or self-moving services offered through MoveBuilder and U-Pack.
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